I no speak inglish good, yeah?

If you have met me in real life and talked to me within the last few years you may have picked up on the fact that I don't speak very well. There are several theories friends, family and the internet have told me as to why. Here are some:

• My brain goes to fast for my mouth to catch up.  Does that mean my mouth muscles are slow or that my mouth went on a coup and my brain no longer has as good of control since it reigned my mouth back into control in 1875?
• I was born to speak another language but my mom apparently taught me the wrong one. DARN YOU MOMMY!
• I am stupid. No comment on that one because clearly I am the smartest person... ever.
• My brain has an in-proportionate amount of one matter than the other. This is a good reply. But just wondering do I have too much of one or too little of the other? Is it my genes? Is it my jeans?
• I get too existed This is true and it might contribute but it is not really a reason as to why.
• I have too many thoughts at once Too many is a subjective term but ok.
• I am too gosh darn emotional Yes but no.
• I suffered from an over aggressive relative. What does that even mean!?
• I suffer from acute nervousness and/or stress. Ok.
• I am just bad at English with no discernible source or reason. Seems legit.

I don't care why I stutter and stammer and mess up my words. I just hate it. I get laughed at, it's embarrassing, and it pisses me off. I once got stuck on the word fuck. I also sound less intelligent when I can't pronounce things properly.